First I was miserable, kicked around by life’s circumstances or by other people; like a mouse being batted by a cat.
Then, I realized that I had personal power and I could change my situations, relationships, my financial situation… I could change it all.
So I changed things, many times before I realized no matter how many problems I solved, fights I won, successes I had…I was never satisfied for long.
I realized I could spend my whole life looking for the right job, the next relationship, the right diet, etc.
Then I stopped running from my fears, stopped chasing the carrots and decided to stick with the life situation I was in. Fully emerging myself in it and accept it completely. Using it like a school. Learning to focus on how I respond to my circumstances no matter what they bring.
When I finally saw things that way and practiced what I learned… ironically that is when things began to change in my favor. Ironic because I completely detached from the circumstances.
This was nice, but ultimately didn’t matter because whatever the positive or negative situation – it will eventually change. This is the nature of this impermanent reality.
All that truly matters is being the state of loving presence in this world.