I wrote a blog several months ago on how we are all spiritual teachers. I was talking to a friend of mine, James John from LAF ( and he added to that that we are all spiritual students as well as teachers.

His comment led me to a major revelation. I realized that it doesn’t matter what we do in our lives, not at all, not one bit. The only thing that ever matters is how we do things. It doesn’t matter if you have a successful career or if you just piece together a living. If you are a parent, spouse, friend, lover or a monk living alone. It doesn’t matter if you travel to exotic destinations or if you live in the same small town your whole life. If doesn’t matter if you win the lottery or if you go bankrupt. It doesn’t matter if you get cancer or never catch a cold. It doesn’t even matter when or how you die.

All that matters is how you do any of the things you choose to do in life. All the matters is how you choose to respond to the experiences life brings you. You can choose to approach everything you do in life from big to small, from tying your shoes to climbing a mountain, as a spiritual student. You can choose to take every experience as an opportunity for spiritual learning or you can choose to plow through every experience to get to the next bigger or better thing.

We are here to:





Slow down


Be present

Think less

Connect with our heart

Connect with our body


Notice the small details

Accept everything fully

See the beauty



We are only here to love and practice being fully present and immersed in life. What we do doesn’t really matter all that much, it’s how we do it that is all that really ever matters. And the how is love. What we do, what we have or what we are is all irrelevant. All that matters is how. What matters is being not doing, being love in all we ever need to do.

In order to be love you need to do things with a present awareness of that love constantly. To let love permeate all that you do. Do things in a slow, focused way, to breathe and fully feel what you are doing.

This world has gotten so far away from that wisdom. We are told the opposite is true – all that matters is what we do. And it doesn’t matter how we actually do it.

This leads to a common phenomena these days.

When my son won an award I went to an assembly at school and I saw all the other parents of little award winners taking photos and videos. I started to do the same. I realized that by focusing on taking a photo of the moment I was completely disconnecting from experiencing the moment. I see people doing this so much these days; on their cell phones missing all the moments. I see people rushing through work, always rushing and so busy. So busy that they don’t even realize they have a choice about how they are doing things. Not realizing the power in that choice. The power to live life to its fullest, to realizing their life’s purpose, to being truly happy. That by choosing to ignore how they do things they are missing most of their chances to love. They are missing what really matters.

The choice to rush through life, the choice to be stressed and unfocused is what causes most of the sickness, pain and failure that we all experience. It is the reason our planet is at risk. When we do not nurture ourselves in how we do things we fail to nurture every living thing and earth itself.

Love is the how.

Not just externally but also internally. Internally it’s not what we think or feel it’s how we choose to experience those feelings and thoughts. How we choose to treat ourselves in response to thoughts and feelings. That is what really matters, not what we think or what we feel.

The how needs to infiltrate all aspects of our internal and external existence. If we just practice it on Sundays, when we feel good, in certain compartmentalized areas or roles that we play in our lives we are missing the point.

Because the how is all that matters.

The how will only ever be made up of the small, seemingly insignificant moments. The present is where the how resides. The how is the reason we are here. It is our only chance to love and Love is who we are. It is our only chance to be our authentic selves. We thought that what we did and the roles we played were what gave us our authenticity but we were wrong. What we did or who we are never mattered. Love is all that ever mattered. Love is the how. How we express love is our authenticity in this world. Love is the common denominator, our shared Oneness.


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